Q&A: Does Anal Play Make You Gay?

Many men are missing out on a completely new world of pleasure, because they’re afraid of the stigma that some people associate with anal play.

The anus – and more importantly the prostate, located inside of the rectum, are two of the most pleasurable places on or in a man’s body. Yet, many people wouldn’t dare entertain the idea of self-pleasure – or pleasure from someone else, anywhere near their butt. The fear is that only gay men engage in butt stuff, and doing anything sexual there – even if it ends up pleasurable, is either a ‘gay act’, or can make you turn gay over time.

There are some logical points behind this – sexual preferences and even your sexual orientation can morph or evolve over time. But does anal play have anything to do with sexual orientation?

In this article, I’ll cover everything you need to know!

What Do We Mean By Anal Play?

So just to get it out of the way, let’s look into some examples of what I mean by anal play. If you haven’t thought about it before, there are a whole lot of sexual acts that one can enjoy that involve the butt.

For example:

• Ass licking (fun fact – the first time I ever made a guy moan was by licking his ass.)
• Anal fingering, which I’m told feels amazing while cumming or getting a blowjob. It certainly feels great when I cum!
• Anal sex, both giving and receiving in the form of pegging.
• Usage of anal toys, such as butt plugs, vibrators, and so on.
• Even erotic massage, having your glutes massaged can be quite pleasurable and quite erotic.

There are plenty of erogenous zones involving the butt, both inside and outside, and integrating some of these acts into your sex life can really spice things up, introducing you to pleasure you’ve never known possible.

The prostate in particular is known to be insanely pleasurable to stimulate, giving it the nickname of the ‘Male G-Spot’ for a reason.

Prostate orgasms are said to be insanely pleasurable beyond anything you can get through traditional masturbation or sex. They are more intense, can last longer, and involve your whole body, rather than being localized to just your penis.

From people that have experienced them, they would consider prostate orgasms a 10/10, where as a regular orgasm would be considered a 2/10 in comparison. Prostate orgasms do not have the refractory period that traditional orgasms do, meaning you can have them over and over again for hours without losing your arousal levels.

I feel very sorry for anybody that finds the idea of prostate orgasms appealing, but forbade themselves from trying due to fear or stigma.

So, Can Anal Play Make You Gay?

I’m happy to share that anal play in itself has absolutely no effect on whether you are straight or gay. It will not magically make you attracted to men, or cause you to want men to do anything to you or your body.

People of all genders and sexual orientations enjoy anal play, because again, these areas of the body are pleasurable. There are so many nerve endings on the ass and anus, even before you get to the prostate.

Cis men enjoy anal play. Cis women enjoy anal play. Trans men enjoy anal play, as do trans women. Straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual, everyone of all genders and sexual orientations enjoy the pleasures that our bodies have to offer.

What’s important is that you take anal play at face value, and view it objectively. You are simply stimulating nerve endings. Most straight people, even if they were getting pegged or using a penis-shaped dildo on themselves, would not be thinking of a man fucking them in the ass while it’s happening. They are simply doing what feels good.

The stigma surrounding anal play does more harm than good. If you start questioning your sexual identity, you will start seeking out evidence that will support your theory. If you believe that you might be bisexual, you’ll start looking for reasons this might be true. When I’ve worked with coaching clients, I’ve had people admit that they’ve been turned on by feminine-looking asses that they later found out were men, or enjoy watching cumshots in porn videos. This can lead to serious emotional insecurity, especially if you live in an area where homosexuality isn’t as accepted.

Of course, we now KNOW that anal play has nothing to do with being gay. However, I can empathize with the fears and anxiety that develops with enjoying it – which again, has nothing to do with the act itself, and everything to do with society’s misguided views.

(And hey, with articles like this one, I’m trying to correct that!)

What CAN Lead To Shifts In Sexual Identity

Believe it or not, there ARE things that can lead to shifts in sexual identity over time. And while anal play isn’t one of them, it can cause identity issues when combined with other actions or behaviors.

Take this example, that I see a lot with people that have porn addictions.

Porn itself is heavily fueled by dopamine – the chemical in your brain that’s tied to anticipating rewards. When you watch porn, your dopamine receptors think you’ve hit the jackpot, and hundreds of women want to mate with you. Score, right?

The only problem is, when people are repeatedly exposed to the same thing, dopamine does not act as intensely as it did the first time. This is why we eventually get bored with the things that used to excite us. It’s not new or novel anymore.

Porn can be problematic because it offers constant novelty – there are always new videos to watch, new concepts to explore. Yet over time, even vanilla porn can become boring.

Some people eventually find themselves drawn to trans, ‘femboy’ or even straight out gay porn. There’s nothing wrong with this, of course.

However, if you know how fetishes develop, it’s largely a product of reinforcement. You watch something catered to a fetish, which excites you sexually. Dopamine is released – your brain is receiving a pleasurable reward. You orgasm, which rewires your brain to crave the trigger for the reward – i.e the fetish, even more. Over time, it becomes more and more of what makes up your sexual preference.

If you watch gay porn for example and cum to it over and over again, you’re going to be aroused and seek it out even if you have no attraction to actual men in real life.

This does not mean that you’re gay. While sexual orientation isn’t necessarily fixed and sexual preferences can evolve or change over time, most cases of porn-induced fetishes disappear or lose strength as you stop engaging or thinking about them. When it comes to the brain, this is one area where ‘use it or lose it’ holds true.

Closing Thoughts

I don’t blame people for wondering whether or not anal play is gay. Sex education in many areas of the world is laughable at best, and although I believe it’s wrong to discriminate against anyone due to sexual orientation, a lot of the world doesn’t feel the same way. It’s wrong, but seeing yourself as gay can have huge emotional effects, and many people have shied away from anal play because of it.

Thankfully, playing with your butt is no more gay than stroking your own penis. A whole new world of pleasure is available to you once you get your ass involved, and I’d hate for you to miss out.

If you want to stay up-to-date with the articles I publish – including male sex toy reviews, some of which will be anal toys, be sure to sign up to my email newsletter. I run occasional giveaways and share exclusive discounts I secure for my subscribers as well, so you may just end up with free toys if you’re on there long enough.

Anyway, wishing you the best, and well, have fun with your butt!

~ Lexi