How To Recognize A Gold Digger – 8 Important Signs

Gold diggers are not easy to spot. And even if you don’t consider yourself wealthy or even well-off, there are people out there – women and men, that will come for whatever money you have.

(Gold diggers were stereotypically women in the past, because men made all the money. Now that it’s equaled out a bit, we are seeing gold digging happening on BOTH sides, though it’s still more common that men are the victims.)

Thankfully, there are some pretty telltale signs you can look out for that may indicate whether they’re only in it for the money.

Everyone deserves to be with someone that actually cares about who they are as a person. So, in this article, let’s look over 8 telltale signs that someone may in fact be a gold digger, out for your money and nothing else!

1. Entitled Attitude

Typically speaking, gold diggers are entitled.

They are used to being spoiled in past relationships, and may have only left them because the other person either caught onto their ways, ran out of money, or they are looking to ‘climb the ladder’ so to speak – aligning themselves with someone even more wealthy, more powerful, and so on.

Emotionally, they have so little invested into you, that they are ready to walk away from you as soon as it’s no longer beneficial to them. They may see themselves as above you in some way, like you owe them simply because they chose to spend time with you.

They may create drama and start problems just so you can ‘resolve’ them in the form of some sort of expensive gift or vacation.

2. Being Attractive Helps

If the other person is very attractive, it helps inflate that sense of entitlement just mentioned. It also gives them even more leverage to use against you.

I hate to say it, but this is particularly true if the gold digger is a woman. All guys want a smoking hot girlfriend, and many gold diggers use sex as a reward. You get sex out of the relationship, so in her mind, you ‘owe’ it to her to spoil her financially in order to keep things fair.

This is a completely twisted way to approach relationships, but they can get away with it because it works. Trust me. I work in the adult industry, and although I consider the type of content I make to be on the more ethical side of things, I’ve witnessed firsthand how much guys will spend for a hot piece of ass. I’ve had coaching clients who have admitted they spent their life savings, all the way to bankruptcy to try to make an attractive woman love them. It breaks my heart to see.

The issue with being attractive – and this is why it’s a stereotype that attractive women are bitchy, is because they KNOW they have options. They have men all the time trying to flirt with them, take them on dates, and of course, spend money on them.

When you’re alone and feeling unwanted, even a single person being interested in you can spark you with joy. When you know you have hundreds of other men that would feel blessed to date you in a second, you don’t hold them with the same value. I guess it’s simple economics, but it feels weird to quantify it like that when we’re talking about human hearts.

Anyway, when you’re just a wallet to someone AND they can find new people straight away, there is no risk of walking away from you. If it stops being profitable or there’s a better opportunity elsewhere, many gold diggers will jump ship.

3. They Seem Out Of Your League

Gold diggers often, but not always date someone that they see as beneath them, in all ways except financially.

Again, this comes down to risk, and the ability to walk away.

For normal people, looks aren’t everything. In fact, no one area of your personality, appearance or status will make or break the relationship. For gold diggers, money is the ONLY thing that matters.

If you have a lot of money, it’s important to look for other value that the person is getting out of the relationship. Do you really think they find you attractive? Do they seem genuinely interested in your life, your goals, your hobbies? Do they actually seem like they are having a good time with you, even if you’re not doing something that costs a lot of money?

These are important questions to ask yourself!

4. They Aren’t Interested In Working Or Contributing Financially

This isn’t a telltale sign on its own, but it is something to take note of.

In most relationships, it’s reasonable for both people to put roughly an equal effort in. In the modern world, one income usually isn’t enough, so it’s not surprising for both partners to work.

If someone doesn’t show any interest in working, or contributing financially at all, this may be a sign that they’re a gold digger.

That being said, what matters more than direct financial contribution is the amount of effort put forth overall.

Many people desire to be housewives or househusbands, and there is nothing wrong with that. It’s actually quite a lot of work!

In addition to time spent cooking, cleaning and taking care of other household chores, non-working partners can actually save the household money by DIYing projects, shopping for deals, and saving the both of you time overall.

If somebody only wants to take, take, take and give nothing in return however except sex, you have reason to be concerned!

5. They Target Older People

It’s common for gold diggers to target older people. In fact, this is where you most commonly see gold diggers portrayed in the media – young, sexy women marrying older men, knowing they’re going to spend lavishly and die soon. Conveniently, leaving much of the inheritance to their wife.

However, gold diggers don’t prey only on senior citizens.

It’s rare that you see a gold digger target a man or woman in their 20’s, unless that person flaunts their wealth or was born into a rich family.

Once you get into your 30’s, 40’s and beyond however, it’s much more likely that you become a target for gold diggers. This is because they know that by this point, most people are established in their careers, no longer are suffering with student loans, and may have disposable income that they can take from you.

6. They Want You To Avoid Using Your Finances For Others

Funny enough, gold diggers are VERY protective over your money. In other words, they don’t want it going to anyone but them.

Anyone that may capture some of your financial attention, or anyone that gets your money, is money that won’t be going to them. And they know that.

They don’t want you signing up for any financial obligations. If you’re not married, this can even include long-term loans or payments, like a new car. They know they won’t be around long enough to see it paid off, and that is a monthly payment that you could be spending on them instead.

I have even heard stories of gold diggers making their partners stop donating to charities and other causes they cared about, because they found these things to be a threat.

Pay attention to any way that they try to reallocate how you spend your money – especially if they directly benefit from it. ‘Saving for a vacation’ may sound wholesome and something a partner that wants to get closer to you would say, but it shouldn’t come at the cost of other areas of life that you want to spend money on.

7. They Show Financial Interest Early On

Gold diggers do not want to waste time on people who are broke. They simply have too many other options they’ll choose to pursue instead.

Therefore, they’ll often ask questions early on – even on the 1st or 2nd date, about your financial situation.

Some will directly ask what your salary is, while others will poke around by asking about what you do for work.

The opposite is true if it’s publicly KNOWN you are wealthy. If you are a person of notoriety or you’re born into a rich family and your peer group knows this, gold diggers have no reason to ask you about your finances. They already know you’re loaded. In fact, they’ll go out of their way to AVOID bringing up your money situation, to give the appearance they are genuinely interested in you as a person.

That being said, it is important for couples to be on the same page when it comes to financial goals and values. However, there is a time and place for it, and in most cases, it really isn’t appropriate for a first date.

8. They Don’t Appreciate The Sentiment Of Other Gifts / Actions

Did you know that there are many ways in which people feel loved, or can show affection to others?

Some of these include physical touch, acts of service, and spending quality time together. I cover the different ‘love languages’ in this article here.

For gold diggers, the only thing they care about is receiving gifts. Not just any gift, but gifts that are expensive.

Most people when receiving a gift, appreciate the thought and sentiment behind it. A trinket that reminds you of a special memory doesn’t have to cost a lot of money, but can be incredibly meaningful to the receiver.

Not to gold diggers. They could care less for sentimental objects, flowers, or something that reminds them of you. They want something they can either flaunt for status, or resell after they’re done with you.

This is why so many gold diggers push people to use expensive gifts as a way to make up after an argument. Some of them even start drama just so they can get a gift in order to resolve it.

The behavior is disgusting, and should be called out when you see it.

Closing Thoughts

Unfortunately, there is no way to know someone’s intentions for sure – even if they exhibit every trait in this list.

Therefore, it’s ultimately up to you to use your best judgement, and don’t be afraid to speak up or back out of the relationship if you feel uncomfortable.

We all deserve someone that loves us for who we are, so don’t settle for someone who is using you. You’re better than this, and you WILL find someone better for you in the long run!

If you have any other questions, don’t hesitate to ask.

Wishing you the best in your future relationships!

~ Lexi