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Q&A: Why Are Porn Plots So Lame? (The Interesting Answer!)

Watch porn from any major studio, and you quickly realize that they don’t pay that much attention to the actual plot.

Heck, when you look at just the ads for different porn sites, it almost seems like they are going out of their way to be ridiculous and over the top.

So, why do studios skimp out on the plots? Why do so many of them seem so ridiculous, poorly acted, and unbelievable? It turns out, there are quite a few different reasons for it.

In this article, I’ll be going over exactly why most porn “plots” – if you can even call them that, are so poorly done, and where you can actually find porn with a plot if that’s something that interests you.

It Wasn’t Always Like This

The first thing to know is that it wasn’t always like this. And if you actually want to see something with at least a little bit of a plot, vintage porn, especially that produced during and before the 1980’s, you’ll find it.

Remember that in the past, porn was mostly sold by the individual film – we didn’t have massive websites with millions of videos, and actually releasing a movie has a much higher barrier to entry. This means that each production had a lot more thought, effort and planning put into it.

In a world where you were paying for each individual video, more care went into making it memorable. And some of that care went into developing a plot, and focusing on well, actually acting instead of just laying there and getting fucked.

Perhaps more importantly though, porn used to be more legally risky to produce.

By including a solid plot in the movie – and spreading sex scenes throughout it rather than making the whole thing about sex, it was easier to convince a judge that the film had artistic value. This made it easier to be protected under the 1st Amendment in the United States, as the film had a coherent story. The sex scenes were merely building upon and enhancing that story.

So, What Happened? Why Are Modern Porn Plots So Stupid?

Other than the loosening of laws, the accessibility of shooting and selling porn has in many ways, inspired a ‘race to the bottom’ when it comes to actually selling copies of your films.

By the same token, our porn habits have changed drastically.

Really, there are four main reasons why porn plots these days are so poorly done.

The first and perhaps the biggest reason is that most people simply don’t watch them. With millions of videos at our fingertips, we no longer sit down to watch one film all the way through. Instead, many of us have multiple tabs open with videos that grabbed our interest. We quickly scrub through the little video preview until we find the parts that excite us, we watch them, and we move onto the next tab.

While I personally believe a good plot heightens the excitement more than just seeing a dick slam in and out of a girl, the reality is that most people don’t really care that much. As long as there is some context or some fantasy they can appeal to, you’ll hold onto that context while you watch. The rest of the video can be shot like any other porn scene. A blowjob here, a quick strip show, some fucking in one position, some fucking in another position, a facial. Rinse and repeat.

Further Reading: Q&A: Why Do Porn Scenes Always End With A Facial?

Because people don’t watch them enough, studios don’t really find it worth the expenses to write a plot. Writing a plot means hiring a writer, forcing performers to memorize lines – which takes time, multiple camera angles, and potentially setting up the set at multiple different locations. Remember that individual scenes for a studio aren’t that profitable – they rely on their large back catalogs to build their income, or sell subscriptions to their sites. In many cases it’s about quantity, over quality.

For a bit of context as a creator myself, 100,000 views on a Pornhub video makes about a whopping $50. And again, because there are millions and millions of videos out there, views aren’t the easiest to come by, even for small to mid-sized studios. They need to build their catalogs quickly and release regular new scenes in order to get people to sign up to their websites – where real money is made, and actually keep people signed up.

Next up, people are excited by fantasies that are completely unrealistic, and these are easy to pull off without much plot. Think about a step-sister stuck under the bed, or a pizza delivery guy getting greeted by a naked woman who doesn’t have money to pay for her pizza. These fantasies are silly, but when you’re horny, your brain doesn’t care. It’s a hot idea that’s quick to pull off, and that’s all you need.

In fact, if the porn stopped our horny-monkey brains from gooning and actually had us think and engage with the film intellectually, we might be more prone to stop watching porn. And companies certainly don’t want that!

This brings me to my last point, which is that cringe porn plots have been popularized by large studios. It’s the industry-standard now. And everybody is always looking to big studios to figure out what works. Sadly, this means even smaller studios and creators are following suit, as it’s what people have come to expect.

What Types Of Porn Actually Have A Plot?

Thankfully, for those of us that actually love a little plot with your porn, there are still some options out there available to you?

Firstly, softcore porn does focus a lot more on the plot and the emotions between the characters, which makes it appealing to some. For more information, I published a whole article on why softcore porn can be so appealing, especially to women.

Many hentai films also have much more of a plot behind them, since it’s sort of been the standard. Hentai has the advantage of being able to create scenarios and concepts that aren’t possible with real people, so it’s worth giving it a try if you’re in the mood to actually watch something. Of course, not all hentai films fall into this category – many jump straight to the sex, just like with normal hardcore porn.

Ecchi anime does not have outright sex scenes, but does contain nudity and sexual undertones. This is an example that puts the plot first. You can find a complete list of ecchi anime on MyAnimeList.

Some of my personal favorites to start with that are very sex-heavy include:

  • To Love Ru
  • High School DxD
  • Interspecies Reviewers
  • Queen’s Blade
  • Kiss X Sis
  • The Qwaser of Stigmata

Finally, we have my favorite form of porn entirely, audio porn. This has performers like me building an immersive scene in your mind, and often roleplaying sex with you throughout it.

Some audios focus a solid 20 minutes on buildup and setting the scene before actually getting to the sex. This is done not only with very thoughtful script writing, but the use of sound effects, ambiences, and actual acting to really paint a powerful picture in your mind.

If you’d like to browse all of the audios I have available, you can do so at LewdLexi.com/catalog/

Reddit’s GoneWildAudio subreddit is also a great place to find audios from other performers. Find one that appeals to you, put on a pair of headphones, lay down and try it out! Audios are so much more rewarding and memorable than regular porn, and while I wouldn’t tell you that they are the only porn worth consuming, they are a great tool when you want an actual story to absorb yourself in.

Note that these aren’t all the options available. I know there are some websites dedicated to making their hardcore pornos a bit more tasteful.

At some point in the future, I’d like to start doing reviews of porn sites, and I’ll post an update with some of my recommendations. Sign up for my Patreon to support the website, and to help make this possible!

Closing Thoughts

Personally, I wish porn would include more of a plot. Maybe it’s just because I’m a woman, but while seeing two (or people fucking) is exciting, I’d love to know why they’re fucking, and why they’re so turned on by each other.

Of course, other types of porn are available if plot is really something that you care about, so I suppose it’s not so bad.

I’d love to hear the silliest porn plots you’ve ever come across, and if you know any major studios that make porn with really good plots, please do us all a favor and share them down below!

~ Lexi

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